I used to be scared of thunderstorms. When I was nine years old I'd visualizing lighting striking and our house engulfed in flames. I did not climb into my parent's bed or shake from fear,but I did not feel peaceful. When it stormed at night, I’d sit in bed reassuring myself that my family would probably survive and that I should not worry. One day I decided that I was not going to be scared any more. I had no clue how to accomplish that, but I believed that I owned my feelings and thoughts, they did not own me.
That was a pivotal moment for me. I was always intrigued by the power of emotions versus the inner strength. Up until then my feelings and thoughts came and went as they pleased; I’d never wondered whether or not I had some say in those moments. Lucky for me I usally emote and think in the middle of the bell curve, rarely the extremes. Before I could feel and hear my heart pound after each rattle of thunder, now I found myself in awe of the beauty that God orchestrated. Instead of hiding and hoping for the best, I was drenched with exhilaration and appreciation.
I’ve had other moments like that where I felt uncomfortable with an emotion or noticed an inappropriate thought and decided to exchange it with feeling good and constructive. I did not understand then how I achieved but I think I have some insight now. The heart of each soul is mindfulness. Mindfulness comes when you can observe your thoughts and feelings without identifying with them. Mindfulness is the source of peace, courage and wisdom and the path of success.
I've had a wonderful life; I even suspect that some would consider me a little sheltered. However there was some sadness, some scares and some stumbles only the way. Writing about the hard times in my life is not intended to be a pity party but a powerful exchange: sharing losses that others can relate to, letting go of the things that still haunt me, and forgiving faults (mine as well as others). Some posts will be about the challenging times in my life, but I hope that you leave LL&L feeling refreshed and relieved. I thank God for every victory and for every tear. I can’t imagine where I’d be without His love and His power.
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